Depression and Elation

I am spending time this evening answering a sixth question of seven aiming to paint an accurate autobiographical picture of my beliefs, values, goals, and desires. The seventh question on the list is one that summarizes all others, so in a sense, tonight's answer is the end of what turned out to be a lengthy sidewalk. If landing here for the first time, a read of the post entitled Conceptualizing offers the specifics of this exploration.

Question number six:
What inspires me to experience the greatest sense of joy and the deepest feelings of sadness?

I will commence with a discussion of sadness and conclude with remarks about joy. Nice to finish on a bright note.

As I mention in previous posts, I co-lead the Communicycle Co-op in Chamblee, Georgia. This small, big-hearted program works with youth and adults in the community, offering viable transportation solutions and teaching the skills of bicycle maintenance and repair. Each week, I learn something new about our program participants, and the revelations often leave me stunned.

I hear stories of abusive home situations, and lack of heat in the wintertime, and bare cupboards. I know of women and men without homes, teens finding acceptance in gangs, youth of thirteen or fourteen bringing children of their own into the world. I see the splintering pain of shattered families, of latchkey kids sleeping restlessly waiting for mother to return home from the third shift, of violent break-ins in the darkest part of night.

The world is overflowing with greed. Those with power all too often use their sway for personal gain, while those without authority become passive recipients of the short end of the stick. I experience the deepest feelings of sadness when I hear these accounts of injustice and see the pain that results.

In contrast, I live a charmed existence, and innumerable privileges sweeten my daily routine. I take little for granted; the richness of daily life does indeed inspire thankfulness and even joy. Several days out of each week, with today being no exception, I roll out of bed into the basement office still wearing jammies. Joy. I have a closetful of mountain bikes that eat singletrack trail for breakfast. Double joy. Every year, my wife and I manage to sneak out for a few three-day holidays, driving around the southeast, camping, hiking, biking, rafting, and experiencing any other form of fun that passes in front of our noses. Joy, joy, joy, joy, joy.

So what is it that inspires the deepest, most complete sense of joy in my life? None other than love itself. To be cherished by a woman, thought heroic in her blinded eyes, listened to, championed, supported; that is a joy deeply profound and blissfully complete. To be cared for by friends old and new: pure gold. To have family members offer arms of love in the confounding moments: brilliant.

I am surrounded by people that offer their listening ears, their kind efforts, their unconditional friendship. Nothing in all of life inspires in me a deeper sense of peace or satisfaction.